A Deserving Dote

I've mentioned this blog before and I do absolutely love it!  She is definitely a messenger of the Lord.  He always gives her the right words that I need to read at just the right moment.  So, I am going to try something new.  She has a feature called "Five Minute Friday".  If you're a blogger yourself, I encourage you to try it out!  Basically every Friday she gives a one word prompt and you're supposed to write for five minutes flat.  No editing or thinking.  Just a quick write from the heart.  It may or may not be pertaining to stay-at-home-mommas (SAHM), but it's my 5 minute labor of love :)  

I've been thinking of a dear friend/mentor the past few days.  So when I saw today's prompt was "again" I set a timer and started writing.  It's not much and I can't promise to participate every Friday, but I hope to get better with each try. 

This blog is dedicated to stay-at-home-mommas and today's feature post is about a SAHM of a different kind, but a SAHM nonetheless  :)

"Again"

She wakes up, lets the dogs outside, makes a cup of coffee, meditates on the Word, cooks her husband breakfast, packs him a lunch, and sends him on his way.  All of this beginning at 4:30 am.  
She looks in on her, takes her to the bathroom, cleans her up, changes her clothes and gets her ready for the day.  Makes her breakfast and gives her vitamins and meds.  
She sets her up with different activities throughout the day.  Threading beads onto yarn, color by number artwork, quiet books, sensory boxes filled with sand and rice.  She fixes lunch, cleans up lunch, and takes a nap.  She goes to meetings and support groups with others like herself and walks around the neighborhood.  She welcomes her husband home, prepares supper, and cleans up after supper.  She tries to unwind in the evening, but is still "on-the-clock".  She washes her up at night, puts her in a nightgown, and tucks her into bed.
She pours herself into bed and wakes up in the morning to do it all again-with a smile.  And for someone whose memory of all of this is wiped clean again and again.
She is the full time caretaker of her mother-in-law who has Alzheimer's.   
She is my aspiration and an inspiration.  Again and again and again. 

A lovely bunch of flowers and a  handmade birthday card from the caretaker herself; just another selfless act  :)

"She is clothed with strength and dignity; She can laugh at the days to come."

                                     - Proverbs 31:25 

                                                                            

Bench Warmers and Babies

I recently saw a sign for a veterinary clinic that said, "If your dog is fat, then you're not exercising enough."  Although we don't have a dog, I know we don't exercise enough.  I'm blessed to have some good genes that I don't really have any weight issues and nursing my daughter really helped keep any extra weight off as well. However I still need to get out and do something.  I used to take A on walks around our neighborhood or local shopping centers all the time, literally every day.  For whatever reason I have fallen out of that habit.  

This past weekend I decided to take A to a park for the first time.  She loved it!  She climbed all over everything like a little monkey.  She crawled through the tunnels, climbed up a rock wall, went down the slides and flew high in the swings!  We were there for about an hour and by the time she was ready to go I'm not sure who was more worn out, me or her. 

 I've always known that I would be the "cool mom" that was climbing on all the playground equipment and swinging with my kids.  Being that A is just over a year old I didn't have much of a choice or she would have been trampled by the big kids.  Today is only Wednesday and we have been 3 times this week, for roughly an hour each visit.  

It says in the Word that our body is a temple.  This phrase is most commonly associated with drinking and drugs.  I think it's more than that though.  We shouldn't indulge in alcohol or drugs, no, but we also shouldn't indulge in sweets, fast foods, or lounging.  Moderation is key to everything.  Ice cream is great, but too much of it causes a stomach ache right?  Well, too much sitting and lounging around can cause some problems too.  

I am writing this so I have something to hold myself accountable.  I have been lounging around watching A play in the living room far too much recently.  I plan on continuing our visits to the park, resuming our neighborhood strolls, and saving up for a bicycle!  I used to love riding bikes and I've been searching local classifieds and thrift stores in hopes of finding a treasure.  

So get out there and play with your kiddos!  Don't be the mom who sits on the benches playing on her phone instead of playing with her kids.  You might feel silly at first, but trust me it's better for everyone in the long run.  Your body will thank you for a little exercise and your kids will cherish the memories of momma and daddy trying to fit through the tunnels :)

 

And a little playground time isn't too bad for the bedtime routine either! 

"Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God?  You are not your own; you were bought at a price.  Therefore honor God with your body," - 1 Cor. 6:19-20

Stranger, Danger!

Maybe since I've become a Momma I've also become a nervous nelly.  But I'd like to think I'm just being extra cautious now days since I have more to look out for and protect than just myself.  Don't get me wrong, my husband does a great job at keeping us safe and protected.  I can't tell you how many times he's responded to my nudges in the middle of the night with an inspection of our apartment as if  he were on some military covert mission - It's usually pretty funny once I get the all clear :)  However there are times that he's not around whether it's being out of town for work or a shopping trip he'd just rather not join.  These are the times when I am on high alert.  Things are so much different than when our parents were kids and even when we were kids.  I remember riding my bike without any concern for predators or kidnappers, and leaving our front door unlocked so we could get in after school.  Unfortunately that is no longer the world we live in, so I've decided to share a few tips on being safe when you're alone with your kiddos or even by yourself.  

These are in no particular order of importance. I feel like they are all important and can hopefully keep you safe while you're out and about!

• No Texting/Talking on the Phone!  
• I know this may seem a bit extreme, but mostly I'm referring to when you're leaving or getting into your vehicle.  If you're inside a store or restaurant it's a little different, there are many more people around - still be alert though!  But if you're walking to your car and your chatting away, or even worse sending a text, you have no idea who is watching you or following you. 
• Lock your doors!
• We all lock our doors when we're out of our vehicles right? Well, here's what I do when it's just A and me.  I unlock the doors, open the back door and lock them all back.  Then I continue getting her into or out of the car as usual.  That way if anything were to happen to me I could shut the door and she would at least be locked away while I try to defend myself.  As opposed to being attacked while an accomplice gets in my car and takes off with my daughter.  See motherhood really gets your imagination working, right? ;)
• Don't Feed the Cat!
• You know what happens when you feed stray cats?  They follow you home.  You can be friendly and say hello if someone prompts you, but don't give out more information than is necessary.  Sometimes we get so caught up in being friendly that we may be inviting an intruder to our home.  No one needs to know that you're out alone or your husbands away on work this weekend or even that your dog died. You're basically saying "Hey you can come over, my husbands gone all weekend and my dog won't be barking anymore!"  Seriously, you just don't know who you could be talking to - man or woman, bad things can still happen.
• Don't be Afraid to Confront!
• If you feel like someone is watching you or following you confront them!  Especially if you are in a public place with many other people around.  If you whip around and ask what they are doing, more than likely they will back down.  They don't want to cause a scene and with so many onlookers starting to stare they will probably go away.  Still, be cautious and have security or even a store manager walk you out to your car.  
• This actually happened to me tonight, which is what got me thinking about writing this post.  I was in Target tonight when I noticed that a man seemed to be following me.  I was bent over playing with A and I immediately stood up straight and kept walking.  I turned and he turned, my heart was pumping.  I was coming up on the make-up aisle and as soon as  I turned into it, I swung around and said, "Can I help you?!"  ... Luckily, for myself and him, he found his wife :)  I know it seems like a funny story, but I'm glad I was aware of my surroundings and noticed some creeper..er husband..following me. 

I come from a family of five kids.  Myself being the oldest, followed by two sisters, and two boys bringing up the rear.  My dad taught all of us how to fight and defend ourselves should the situation ever arise.  My sisters and I also carry a key chain with pepper spray.  We have never had to use it, but we are ready and prepared if need be. 

When you were in grade school did you ever know of a bully that wouldn't back down when confronted or given a dose of his own medicine?  Not likely.  And that's what most predators are, bullies.  All it takes is a little courage to fight back.  I pray that I never have to defend myself or my child.  But rest assured that if that ever happens, even though I will be scared to death, I'm not going down without a fight!

"Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes." -                                                 

                                                     Ephesians 6:11

Playing Is Learning!

Maybe I'm old fashioned, but I believe that playing is learning and learning can be playful.  Confused? My beliefs aren't too much different than the Montessori way of teaching.  I believe in allowing children free movement in that they are not always confined to a desk and they are able to explore different activities or lessons on their own.  Many people will think that the children simply run wild and rampant but this couldn't be further from the truth.  There are different lessons available to them and they are able to play and learn at their own pace.  A huge contrast to conventional learning where children are taught to sit at desks, raise their hands to use the restrooms, and are taught lessons in very short amounts of time.  It's no wonder there are so many kids struggling in schools.  They can't even do something as personal as using the restroom without making it public to the class.  I'm not saying there shouldn't be boundaries, of course kids need boundaries and rules.  However I do think that allowing kids to be creative while they are young can help channel their behaviors much more effectively than restraining them in a desk all day.  When you start a new job somewhere do you sit in the break room on the computer the whole day or do you shadow an experienced employee who can show you the rounds and let you get some hands-on lessons?  My point exactly, so I will get off my soapbox now :)

So with that being said I am always looking for something creative and different to keep my kiddo occupied and out of trouble, while still being somewhat educational too.  Of course you can scour the web for tons of ideas, however my drug of choice is Pinterest.  It's ridiculously addicting!  If you're not familiar with it, it's a website that is a virtual bulletin board or pin board.  You can save neat craft ideas, tasty recipes you would like to try, sewing tips; seriously the possibilities are endless.  

Still the cute ideas you find on Pinterest may not be affordable or available when you're in a bind.  Luckily, I have some creativity genes of my own and today I put them to good use!  So here's several activities you can do with your little ones.  Keep in mind that A is only one so they are very simplified, you can always add something extra to make it more challenging. 

 First I dug through my craft dresser - literally a dresser filled with drawers full of craftiness - and I came across some different colored felt.  So I sorted them into color piles and also laid out some measuring cups and watched. 

She started out by putting them to one side, then the other.  Then she figured out how to nest them and then handed them off to me, such a giver :)

 

She got bored with the nesting cups pretty quickly so I redirected her attention to the felt and she actually spent several minutes meticulously separating each sheet.

As I came back with another activity for her to play with I caught her doing her own sensory activity in my tea glass!  So I turned that into a learning experience as well and said, "Oh, it's cold isn't it?  Is it slippery too?"  I know she doesn't fully comprehend this yet but that's what learning is right?!

I bought a pack of rings from Ikea recently and actually this paper towel holder too that I turned into a ribbon dispenser (also an idea from Pinterest).  I took off all of the ribbon and put the rings on ...

 

She knew that the rings were on there and she could pick them up one by one to get them off but she didn't quite get how to put them back on so instead she sat them on the bottom.  And of course she had to put it in her mouth, but hey taste is a sense too!

     

She found the cups again and put the rings inside, took them out, put them back in, shook them out everywhere, then eventually collected them all and started bringing them to me :)

And since spaghetti with a one year old is obviously a sensory activity I had to post this one too!  

I could go on and on with different ideas to do with your kids young and old, big and small.  Even on a budget you can look around your home and find things that are engaging.  Don't get me wrong though, we still have a toy box full of everyday toys!

So what can you come up with?  I'd love to know! 

Mommy Meltdown on Aisle One...

I read here one of the most encouraging things to do for other mommas is to let your guard down. Be vulnerable once in a while.  Sometimes the most reassuring thing to do is let her walk into your home when it looks like a war zone.  It helps her to know that you don't always have it all together. And let me tell you, Lisa Jo has encouraged me many, many times.  So if it's pertaining to motherhood and she says it, I'm pretty sure it's true.

So here I am broken and humbled and definitely not having it all together.  I'm metaphorically opening the door and letting you come into my home in hopes that I will not only encourage you, but that maybe you too can leave a little encouragement for me.

Today is the day I failed as a momma.  I yelled at A today.  As soon as I did, it broke my heart.  If she was a sassy toddler or a mouthy teenager maybe I wouldn't feel so bad. But she's not, she's one. One year old!  Let's see I think it started this morning when she threw a fit when we were done brushing our teeth and I took her toothbrush away.  Then she threw cheerios on the floor as I was making us some breakfast.  She fussed when I changed her clothes.  She kicked the bowl of mac and cheese out of my hand when I was  trying to give her lunch.  She hollered and yelled at Target because she didn't want to be in the buggy.  She screamed and dropped to the floor when I let her out but made her hold my hand.

Now let me reassure you, I am not the parent who laughs at their child's every  mishap thinking it's cute.  Nor am I the parent who says, "No, don't do that." over and over and over.  However I am usually the parent with patience and love when I discipline.  I sternly say, "No" once, maybe twice. Then I resort with a swat on the butt or a short time-out in her crib until she calms down.  Then I'll go pick her up and love on her, telling her why she can't do whatever she did.  I know I said she's only one, but I want her to know from the beginning that love and discipline go hand-in-hand.  In fact, I discipline because I love.  But, I digress.

Tonight was the first night that I actually looked forward to our bedtime routine.  How awful is that?! Eight pm wasn't coming fast enough.  I couldn't wait to get some jammies on her, rock her to sleep, and lay her down for some peace and quiet.  As soon as I pulled her door shut, I breathed a sigh of relief.  

I stalked around on Facebook for a while, did some browsing on Pinterest, and finally I broke down in tears.  Not just because I raised my voice but because I shut the door and was glad.  Glad that the day was over, glad that I could steal away from her for a moment of quiet, glad that I was done.  Even as I write I am tempted to tiptoe into her room and hold her in my arms for a midnight apology, but of course she would wake up and the fight to get her back down would ensue. 

So that's it.  My motherhood meltdown.  Aren't you happy to know that we have a God who never fails us?  He never loses patience or hope or love.  He picks us up when we fall down and sets us on our feet again, just like we do with our kids time and time again. 

 For all of you veteran mommas out there who have been doing this thing called parenting for some time now, I need you.  I need a pat on the back, a hug, an its-going-to-be-okay embrace.  Let me know that you've been here before and that it will get better.  Let me know that She will get better!  Some days I have a one year old going on terrible two's and those days last forever, but the sweet ones seem to fly on by. For the novice mommas, like myself, I hope this post helps you to know that you're not alone.  Here's hoping the tantrums and tiffs are few and far between and the smiling, sunny moments are here to stay :)


"Come to me, all you who are weary and heavy laden, and I will give you rest." - Matthew 11:28-29

"You are my Sunshine, my only Sunshine. You make me happy when skies are gray.  You'll never know dear how much I love you.  Please don't take my Sunshine away."

How'd you get so smart?

I brought A to our bed around 6 this morning because I think she had a bad dream :(  So anyway, she nestles in between us and falls right back to sleep.  I woke up about an hour later, ironed M a shirt for work, chatted for a minute and sent him on his way. After I walked M out and locked the front door, I got back in bed with my snuggle-bug.

I'm laying in bed, half-asleep, and I feel something on my mouth...I open my eyes to see A sitting on M's pillow holding her foot in her hand, staring intently at me as she brushes her stinky toes across my lips.  I immediately burst into laughter and she follows in a fit of giggles.  Once she knows it's funny she proceeds to put them on my nose, my eyes, and my ears.  It was hilarious.

Flash forward a few hours; she's carrying her baby doll around the house patting it on the back and swaying side to side.  A few days ago she figured out that the bottle goes in the baby's mouth.  She would sit on the floor with the baby doll in front of her and now she cradles her in one arm and feeds her with the other. Today she tried to makes a shh sound but couldn't quite get it, so instead she sounded like she had a lisp - thhh :)

We can show her something once or twice and she pretty much picks it up right away.  Every day she amazes me with what she can do and who she is becoming.  She's a beautiful mix of her Daddy and myself and she has a personality all her own.

Today's post has no moral of the story, no lesson to be learned.  Just a little glimpse into my day with my amazingly smart little girl.  Hey, a proud momma has to brag once in a while! 

If You're Happy and You Know It...

"If you're happy and you know it clap your hands.  If you're happy and you know it clap your hands.  If you're happy and you know it, then your face will surely show it.  If you're happy and you know it clap your hands."

Seems easy enough, right?  But for some people everything is so complicated and messy and miserable.  Some people think their world is falling apart when happiness is right under their nose.  Sure, we all have bad days where everything seems to go wrong and situations happen that make us angry.  We're all human, those days are going to happen, but YOU create your own happiness.  You have to choose to let things go and not let them hinder you from living a happy life.  Did you eat supper tonight?  Do you have a warm bed to crawl into? Is your family healthy? By those three things alone, you are already more blessed than most people in the world.  

Today I had to email my husband to call my cell phone until I answered.  My daughter hid it somewhere, yet again, and  I found it under the kitchen sink, yet again. My parents and two of my siblings stayed with us for New Years in our two bedroom apartment. My brother and sister slept in A's room with her and my parents slept in the living room on our futon from our college years.  I know plenty of people that would rather them stay in a hotel for lack of space and to save on the clutter from extra bags and bedding.  Around the second night I found myself getting a tad anxious.  I like order - A place for everything and everything in its place.  I don't like extra pillows and blankets laying out, or extra shoes and socks stranded by the front door. 

 Let me backtrack a little.  Earlier that day my dad took my husband, sister, and myself to see The Hobbit at the movie theater.  If you haven't seen it it's definitely a must see. For those of you who have seen it, do you recall the scene where all the dwarves invade Bilbo's house and pantry and  they are loud and eating all of his food?  He's getting frustrated and Gandolf says, "Bilbo, it's just a merry gathering."  That's what I had to tell myself.  It's just a merry gathering!  They don't get to visit all the time and we live in an apartment.  So, yes things are going to be a little cramped and probably messy.  But it won't last forever and I can put my home back in order.  And once that minivan pulls out I'll be looking forward to  them coming back anyway.   

So I forgot about the extra socks and shoes and made the decision to be happy.  Besides, my brother and sister were begging me to play a game with them.  And how can you not be happy, no matter what the mess around you, when your entire family is in stitches from an old-fashioned family board game?  :)

"A happy heart makes the face cheerful, but heartache crushes the spirit." -Proverbs 15:13